Life dealt me alot of troubles...mani of which happened when i was young... and it shaped me alot to who i am...(this "who i am" is veri messed up)...i feel so out of place...

one of the troubles was that i was born in a well-to-do family, and my father made a wrong investment...lost a lot of money, and shifted to a small flat in Yishun...then i had to coped with living life without luxuries...and i coped so well...i didnt ask for any toys, red packets (with money inside) i got during chinese new year had to be used to buy school books, food...no complains...(my parents were deep in debts)...i lived a life unlike other children my age...(mani of my classmates have $2000 - $3000 in their banks acc, excluding the money they spent, and i had onli 1k+, without spending anything)...

we past that stage already, but my father is now spending alots of money on gadgets...like an iphone 3G (he dumped his second-hand 2G phone on me...after that whenever he scolds me he says like "I gave u an iphone already, then u still behave so badly"...but it lost its charm already, coz my father used it already, and my bros and i didnt find it interesting anymore...)...and leaving me with nothing...

another trouble is that i have a face that makes it easy for ppl to call me "nerd" or "geek" (yea...alot of my friends go like "KEEE-NERD!!!" zzz...), though i wan to live my own life...stupid specs (my parents simply had to let me read - i went to some nusery schools even b4 i learnt to walk...)

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this'll sound funi...but i have a few stuffed animals...but when the world out there doesnt understand me (wadever u noe about me now is juz the tip of the iceberg...) my stuffed animals will be my friends (imagination is my strong point) ...its where i find acceptance in the world of strangers, its where i find advice in the world of deception (my imagination shapes my own world - every stuffed-animal will have its own personality, and this is how i see where every personality fits in society...all excect my type of personailty - the outcast)...it is where i simulate the world in my room (actually i have no room of my own - that's y i need much more time alone)...it helps me understand life...

P.S. try not to comment me, or message me about this blog...if i know who is watching...then i'll be more restrictive on what i write, and u will never understand me...this is the onli place where i unravel my life